Change
One of my favorite past times is to work on scrap booking. I don't know why, but it's a one of the ways that helps me relax. I really enjoy doing such things. My most recent scrapbook was on my (and my family) recent trip/cruise to Bermuda. It's fun to go back to it and remember all the fun times we had (even though it was just less than 4 months ago). I even enjoy scrap booking for other people. I have done a scrapbook for my mom as well as my friend (actually, my niece's other grandma). Both were about my niece and how much she's changed throughout the past years. It's so fun to see how my niece has changed from when she was just one day old til now---a very energetic 2-1/2 yr old!
Someone asked me a question on Friday which I had asked of me several if not many times in my life. It was the infamous question of "do you ever which you can change your appearance" or the other side "Do you ever wish you looked differently?" As a kid I would have told you flat out "Yes! I WANT to look different" I remember thinking that and saying that. I remember hating (and still hate) going to the hospital for repeated but necessary surgeries. It wasn't until about 11 yrs ago my whole perspective how "changing my appearance" changed. When this question was asked of me. I looked my friend in they eye with a smile on my face, and simply said "No. Even if by some miracle and push of a button I can look "normal" (whatever that means), I still wouldn't want to change." Why? I truly and whole-heartedly believe that this disfigurement, this disability is a gift from God----a blessing in disguise. I have more Faith in God and don't believe I would be who I am if I didn't have to struggle through this. I'm not saying I enjoy the struggle and that there are times I wish it weren't so, but I can't imagine my life without what I have. I believe that my dis-figurement, disability, etc is what has given me a compassion to work with others with their own set of problems. I can empathize with them and at the same time, share with them how God has used my own problems to become His daughter and to be better able to serve Him.
My friend then asked me "So I guess those extreme makeovers is not one of your favorite shows, even if it's not on anymore". I told her basically, Yes. I didn't like those shows. It wasn't the show itself, I told her. It was more of the reasoning behind it. It's sad to see people spend thousands of dollars just to have a smaller nose, a prettier face, bigger breasts, etc. It just shows how vain this world is. Yes, I wouldn't give up how I look for anything, but at the same time, what I wouldn't give to have surgery and to spend money or go through agonizing plastic/reconstructive surgery to take out the overgrown nerve tissues or make my face more symmetrical so that eventually, my eyes can have surgery and then.............. the list goes on and on. I don't demean anyone who does have plastic surgery, but I also point out that beauty is inward. You have to be someone who absolutely needs plastic surgery for health reasons to understand how silly it is to go through plastics without any real reason...this is my answer to my friend. It was just something that stuck to me.
Just like my niece and all of us, I've changed over the years. I've changed physically due to many needed surgeries. But that's just a minor change. All those minor changes leads to something bigger....a spiritual change. I see God's faithfulness every day toward me. But I especially see it when I see His hands upon me when I do have to go through a physical change (a.k.a surgery). My faith and love for Him continues to grow.
...and on the side note. Praise God I haven't had to have any major facial surgeries for almost 2 yrs now! But then again, I have my apt with the doctor this spring so things might be different then. Even then, I'm thankful that I haven't had to go through as many surgeries as I once had to.
Someone asked me a question on Friday which I had asked of me several if not many times in my life. It was the infamous question of "do you ever which you can change your appearance" or the other side "Do you ever wish you looked differently?" As a kid I would have told you flat out "Yes! I WANT to look different" I remember thinking that and saying that. I remember hating (and still hate) going to the hospital for repeated but necessary surgeries. It wasn't until about 11 yrs ago my whole perspective how "changing my appearance" changed. When this question was asked of me. I looked my friend in they eye with a smile on my face, and simply said "No. Even if by some miracle and push of a button I can look "normal" (whatever that means), I still wouldn't want to change." Why? I truly and whole-heartedly believe that this disfigurement, this disability is a gift from God----a blessing in disguise. I have more Faith in God and don't believe I would be who I am if I didn't have to struggle through this. I'm not saying I enjoy the struggle and that there are times I wish it weren't so, but I can't imagine my life without what I have. I believe that my dis-figurement, disability, etc is what has given me a compassion to work with others with their own set of problems. I can empathize with them and at the same time, share with them how God has used my own problems to become His daughter and to be better able to serve Him.
My friend then asked me "So I guess those extreme makeovers is not one of your favorite shows, even if it's not on anymore". I told her basically, Yes. I didn't like those shows. It wasn't the show itself, I told her. It was more of the reasoning behind it. It's sad to see people spend thousands of dollars just to have a smaller nose, a prettier face, bigger breasts, etc. It just shows how vain this world is. Yes, I wouldn't give up how I look for anything, but at the same time, what I wouldn't give to have surgery and to spend money or go through agonizing plastic/reconstructive surgery to take out the overgrown nerve tissues or make my face more symmetrical so that eventually, my eyes can have surgery and then.............. the list goes on and on. I don't demean anyone who does have plastic surgery, but I also point out that beauty is inward. You have to be someone who absolutely needs plastic surgery for health reasons to understand how silly it is to go through plastics without any real reason...this is my answer to my friend. It was just something that stuck to me.
Just like my niece and all of us, I've changed over the years. I've changed physically due to many needed surgeries. But that's just a minor change. All those minor changes leads to something bigger....a spiritual change. I see God's faithfulness every day toward me. But I especially see it when I see His hands upon me when I do have to go through a physical change (a.k.a surgery). My faith and love for Him continues to grow.
...and on the side note. Praise God I haven't had to have any major facial surgeries for almost 2 yrs now! But then again, I have my apt with the doctor this spring so things might be different then. Even then, I'm thankful that I haven't had to go through as many surgeries as I once had to.
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