Strugglin'
You would think that someone who had gone through surgery almost every year or even twice a year (three times a year as a child) for 30 yrs would get used to it or even get used to hospitals, doctors, etc. No, I'm not scared of them; I just don't particularly care to be near it. Even if I have to visit a client or friend--it gives an uneasy feeling. I know most surgeries, if not all, is really "elective". You don't HAVE to have it, but it's suggested for your own health and comfort. I chose surgery since all the other non-surgery electives have "failed" and I have been in a great deal more pain than mid last year. I am constantly finding myself these past few months asking "why" and hearing no answers. Since October, my shoulder has been very sore; PLUS I've fallen twice and injured my back (ongoing PT now) I get myself all worked up and let the simple things in life or work affect me in a personal matter. It's not good. I need to remember to rely on God and NOT have any self-reliance.
I am scheduled for surgery on Feb 10. This time is to repair a nerve impingement and possible tear. Sadly, my original doctor decided he was going to retire at the end of last year so I got placed with another orthopedic doctor within the same practice. Dr. Smith seems very nice and caring; spent a lot of time with me. He even suggested that getting an MRI wasn't worth my time or money since he has to go into my shoulder to repair the impingement...so, if he's in there and see a tear, he will repair it. Thank God I don't have to go through an MRI since I am so claustrophobic...Sometimes I wonder if I hate surgeries more or MRIs more. Hmmm... Anyhow, the surgery is called "decompression of the shoulder" surgery. Dr. Smith said that I should be able to return to work within 2-4 weeks IF things go well and IF I am up to it and feeling better. I surely hope it works out that way. Good thing is that this surgery doesn't need any preauthorization since arthroscopic surgery is already covered under my insurance.
Second part of my strugglin':
I got this letter of authorization of service that is allowing me to have surgery between Feb 3 and the 11. Only it was authorizing UVA to do this. Weird, huh? I'm thinking to myself that this is crazy and was wondering if the insurance company made a mistake. I was also wondering if by chance my shoulder surgery HAD to be authorized because the dates authorized falls into the time frame of my scheduled shoulder surgery. I was confused. I called S.Health/Coventry and they told me it was authorized for Dr. Gampper (my reconstructive surgeon) to perform my surgery. I was confused. I then called Dr. Gampper's secretary to figure this whole thing out. Apparently he asked them to authorize a facial reconstructive/ tumor removal for those given dates. I told the secretary I was clueless to all this because I had thought I had discussed IN DETAIL to Dr. Gampper back in Oct that I wanted to wait to the end of 2010 to have surgery again (he even suggested to get my shoulder thing squared away first and knew it was going to be the beginning of the year) Of course, the secretary told me I'm not bound to having the surgery in Feb and that the good thing about this is that if surgery was to be scheduled for the end of 2010....it'd be authorized already; only the dates need to be changed. Confused yet? I still am but at least I know for sure I don't have surgery for my tumors yet.....only my shoulder in Feb 10. Strugglin' part? Well, I questioned about all this confusion. What is going on? Why is this so complicated? It's hard enough to think about one surgery, but to have to hear about "two" surgery is stressful. NOT only to me (because I do have to work, and I do need to make a living, etc) but I'm sure it's stressful on my parents, and maybe even my bosses (when I'm out, who's doing my job?). This whole ordeal has gotten me to think about my life and all. I mean...I feel bad enough to have to have this shoulder surgery; yet it's necessary. I also feel bad for the END of the Year when I once again have to ask for time off to remove the necessary tumors again. This removal is an ongoing thing and sure, I can put it off til whenever, but putting it off sometimes isn't a good idea.
Life is complicated. I'm still learning to lean heavily on God and find Strength in Him.
I am scheduled for surgery on Feb 10. This time is to repair a nerve impingement and possible tear. Sadly, my original doctor decided he was going to retire at the end of last year so I got placed with another orthopedic doctor within the same practice. Dr. Smith seems very nice and caring; spent a lot of time with me. He even suggested that getting an MRI wasn't worth my time or money since he has to go into my shoulder to repair the impingement...so, if he's in there and see a tear, he will repair it. Thank God I don't have to go through an MRI since I am so claustrophobic...Sometimes I wonder if I hate surgeries more or MRIs more. Hmmm... Anyhow, the surgery is called "decompression of the shoulder" surgery. Dr. Smith said that I should be able to return to work within 2-4 weeks IF things go well and IF I am up to it and feeling better. I surely hope it works out that way. Good thing is that this surgery doesn't need any preauthorization since arthroscopic surgery is already covered under my insurance.
Second part of my strugglin':
I got this letter of authorization of service that is allowing me to have surgery between Feb 3 and the 11. Only it was authorizing UVA to do this. Weird, huh? I'm thinking to myself that this is crazy and was wondering if the insurance company made a mistake. I was also wondering if by chance my shoulder surgery HAD to be authorized because the dates authorized falls into the time frame of my scheduled shoulder surgery. I was confused. I called S.Health/Coventry and they told me it was authorized for Dr. Gampper (my reconstructive surgeon) to perform my surgery. I was confused. I then called Dr. Gampper's secretary to figure this whole thing out. Apparently he asked them to authorize a facial reconstructive/ tumor removal for those given dates. I told the secretary I was clueless to all this because I had thought I had discussed IN DETAIL to Dr. Gampper back in Oct that I wanted to wait to the end of 2010 to have surgery again (he even suggested to get my shoulder thing squared away first and knew it was going to be the beginning of the year) Of course, the secretary told me I'm not bound to having the surgery in Feb and that the good thing about this is that if surgery was to be scheduled for the end of 2010....it'd be authorized already; only the dates need to be changed. Confused yet? I still am but at least I know for sure I don't have surgery for my tumors yet.....only my shoulder in Feb 10. Strugglin' part? Well, I questioned about all this confusion. What is going on? Why is this so complicated? It's hard enough to think about one surgery, but to have to hear about "two" surgery is stressful. NOT only to me (because I do have to work, and I do need to make a living, etc) but I'm sure it's stressful on my parents, and maybe even my bosses (when I'm out, who's doing my job?). This whole ordeal has gotten me to think about my life and all. I mean...I feel bad enough to have to have this shoulder surgery; yet it's necessary. I also feel bad for the END of the Year when I once again have to ask for time off to remove the necessary tumors again. This removal is an ongoing thing and sure, I can put it off til whenever, but putting it off sometimes isn't a good idea.
Life is complicated. I'm still learning to lean heavily on God and find Strength in Him.
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