In My Need I Seek Your Help.......

There hasn’t been a huge change in things regarding my health since my last update/blog post.   My pain management doctor has tried a different form of non-steroid/non medication injection (for my abdominal pain) that seems to help some (to be explained later in the post).  It may need to take a few tries to see if this treatment works; that is, if I decide if I want to continue this kind of treatment.  As for my head pain and neck pain, my neurologist is doing all he can for now with medication therapy; and working along with my pain management doctor who is holding off other forms of treatment until he can slow down things with my abdominal pain.  In the meantime, I get some relief by going to my chiropractor/kinetic energy doctor in town. 

I continue to be grateful for the doctors I have –those who are not giving up on me and trying very hard to try to find a solution to the cause of all this pain.  So far, my pain management doctor at Augusta has not given up on me; in fact, the practice just hired a new doctor (I think he is also a surgeon) that relocated from Cleveland Clinic to practice here in the Shenandoah Valley.    Both doctors are trying their best to think of possible causes for all this pain and then think of possible solutions to treat this pain.  I’ve said it many times and I’ll continue to say it: I’m so thankful for the doctors who are working with me and taking the time to actually listen to me and hear me.   
God has given me great support system as I face many things in life. One of them is a very supportive church and friends. I can honestly say I could not get through this without all the prayers and love and reminders of those love and prayers on a routine basis.   I’m grateful for where God has placed me in my spiritual home.   I was talking to some friends at church one Sunday and shared with her how much Cov-Pres means to me and how much the leadership and pastors mean to me.   I told a close friend (We've known each other since we were young), that I never understood what grace  really meant until I came to Cov-Pres……AND ESPECIALLY these past several years as I’ve been struggling with a lot of health issues.  I’m not just talking about learning/understanding what the grace of God is, but I’m also talking about grace among God’s people.    With my illness and health situation being so unpredictable at times, so many of my brothers and sisters in Christ in the ministries I serve in (especially the Worship Team!!) has extended so much grace to me when I call out the last minute when I’m not well.  I used to feel so bad about doing this or even feel bad about not going to church because of being sick (due to past church experiences over 13yrs ago); but I have grown to understand that I shouldn’t feel bad and that I should accept grace as it is given to me. 
I digressed slightly…….I apologize.
In regards to this update, there isn’t much for me to tell you except what I already wrote.  I haven’t written in over two months because really there isn’t much to say or update. Sometimes my heart has words, but getting words from my brain to my hands is tough at times. I’ve been having increased pain the last 2-1/2 weeks  It has been really rough and making me very tired. Back on September 12, 2014, Dr. Lee (pain management doctor) did a procedure called “Denervation”.  Basically, he goes in with a needle and sends in energy impulses to “redirect the nerves to go somewhere else in the body.  For the first week, it is common for the area to hurt (which is supposed to hurt), but then the goal is for the area to have little to no pain.  He only used 27% energy at first to see how it worked (lowest energy)   I had some relief but not a lot so, he is going to try to do another procedure again on Nov 20th and use 58% energy to see if it will last longer.  His goal is to hopefully use this as a way to control pain and in between he said he may need to use the pain shots.  I’m praying that the energy shots will help on its own!
In all honesty, I’m tired. So. Tired. Yes, physically tired that comes with the territory that pain brings.  Not just that, but just tired of being tired of all of the doctors’ appointments, tests, treatments, no answers, etc….  It’s so easy to become discouraged; your prayers have helped me not to completely become discouraged.   
I probably have shared this on numerous occasions, but it’s worth sharing again.   My favorite Psalms that I cling to for assurance of help and God’s love for me is Psalm 121:
I lift up my eyes to the hills.
    From where does my help come?
My help comes from the Lord,
    who made heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot be moved;
    he who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, he who keeps Israel
    will neither slumber nor sleep.
The Lord is your keeper;
    the Lord is your shade on your right hand.
The sun shall not strike you by day,
    nor the moon by night.
The Lord will keep you from all evil;
    he will keep your life.
The Lord will keep
    your going out and your coming in
    from this time forth and forevermore
___
I came across this song providentially, while trying to find another song by Ron Hamilton.   It spoke volumes to me.  It's so true.  I'm not just talking about physical strength, although it plays a big role in my life.  But the weakness that comes from discouragement is sometimes bigger than the physical weakness.  Prayers, the Word, and songs like this one is what helps me get through these trials...


  Please don't think I am sending out a complaint here about how this is tough and discouraging (no matter how true this is) my health status is.  My point here is that I want to be honest with you all since many of you ask me "how are you doing?" or "how do you cope with this?"  I couldn't get through this without God's love and help and friends like you who encourage and pray for me a long the way.   Through this all, I continue to find it a comfort and blessing to minister to others when I can and if I'm able too.  I enjoy serving on the Worship Team, Nursery Team, and the College Ministry. Those times of serving blesses me.....times I get to pray for others (especially those who are going through their own trials), blesses me as well.
As I've said before, I may never know what is causing all my health issues; and even though I'm so tired of it, ultimately it is God's Strength and Power that gets me through the day.  
"In my weakness now I come, Lord, be my Strength and be my Song.  I my need I seek your Help, Lord.  I am weak, but You are Strong."
  

Comments

Anonymous said…
Thanks for the story and the insight you share here.

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