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My Passion and Prize

Today was a very off day for me.   Off day as in busy and rough day for me.  I haven't been feeling well all this week; my nausea has flared  up more than usual (which I haven't had nausea for quit a long time), my stomach pain has increased and my headaches has been bad.   Also my sinuses has been bothering me since Monday.  With my Mom's "push" I called in to schedule an appointment to see my doctor; I was able to see my doctor right away  (as in I called and they said I could come in immediately!).   Turns out I have a sinus infection.  It's hard to function with a sinus infection along with other health issues.  I am thankful for antibiotics, muscle relaxants, and pain medicines!    Later in the afternoon, I was DESPERATELY looking for some batteries in the closet for my iHOME.  Unfortunately, I couldn't find any; but I came across a cassette tape by Steve Green (I know, doesn't cassette ...

My Desire

It's a New Year.  Every new year, we hear of new resolutions.   How often do people stick to the resolutions I have no clue.  I rarely make any resolutions due to the fact that I know I probably would be upset if I don't stick to them.   I have made a few over the years that relates to health issues such as stop drinking soda and eating 2-3 fruit/yogurt a day, which I have achieved and continue to the past 2 years.   Most of you who are on Facebook, noticed that on New Years, Facebook asked the question "what is your New Year's resolution?".    As said before I rarely think about this.   But it struck me this year.   This past year, as some of you know, has been an extremely rough year for me.   First I looked at my 2012 calendar and realized that every single month  had 1-3 doctor appointments written down on it.   It was either at UVA or AHC; it was a doctor's visit or ...

Jehova Jireh

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Like all vacations, one has to return to reality.  There are chores to be done.  For me, it's more reality than usual.  With my Mom in NY, I'm faced with more tasks than I'm used to and more energy and pain is drawn out of me.  I don't mind at all and I push forward as I can.  Cooking and cleaning more than usual has reminded me of years ago when I was able to live on my own in my own apartment in Harrisonburg. This past week has been busy....I had 2 UVA appointments and tomorrow (Dec 7th) I have an appointment with my Primary Care doctor.  This past Tuesday 12/4/12  I had a minor procedure done at the Pain Management Center.  It is called a TPI or Trigger Point Injection.   It's basically strong pain reliving medication to localize the pain where it hurts the most.  At first, it makes it numb at first but the doctor told me that the real noticeable affect won't be seen until the series of 3 injections is done....

Happiness

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Thursday 11/28-Sunday 12/2,  Gina and I  had this: No major worries.  Not one single important phone calls to return.   No facebook.  No emails.   Yes, there were hurdles, including some major pain for the both of us to the point of crying.   A horrible anxiety attack for me (that's another story in itself) and a major crushing headache.   However, by God's grace, He saw us through it through prayers, pain meds, and us renting a electric wheelchair..... yes, we rented an electric scooter.   I have to say, Gina got it down pack.  Me, well, I think I should be banned from ever renting one again.  Oh, I didn't run anyone down, but I think I probably would have if those trash cans and guard rails were people. It was a wonderful trip.   We got our wish.... we saw Mickey.   It may sound childish, but every adult has a childhood dream.     We got to see Pluto and Minnie...

Roses Among the Thorns

Today is Thanksgiving.   All of November I have been posting each day about what I am thankful for on Facebook.   I plan to continue this through the end of December, except that I plan to change December to "my Treasures of Christmas" which in many ways is the same thing as what I am thankful for. I've been through so much this year.  I've had a lot of physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional hurdles that even now is lingering on and burying themselves into my heart and body.  I try not to complain.......People (including doctors) remind me about how long my year has been and believe me, no one knows as much as I do. I can go on and on listing my thrones this year.   Thrones such as: more than one or two UVA appointments a month countless MRIs or CTs scans many invasive testings/surgeries hearing  of "we don't know the answers" being referred from one doctor to another feeling hopeless, helpless, fearful  Deaths of friends News tha...

Stumbling

A few nights ago, I had an unusual dream .  I was dreaming that I was up front on stage at church (Covenant Presbyterian) with a few members of the worship team, our Pastor of Worship, and our ASP kids, and ASP leader.   All of us were positioning ourselves upfront to get ready to help the ASP do their annual Christmas program.   As I was trying to stand up front (with my back facing the audience) to help the children, my foot slipped and I fell.  Not sure how that happened, but I fell.   Two people cane to my aide to help me get up. Once I got up and they let go of me, I fell AGAIN.  I was horrified, but I refused to step away and sit down.  I even went as far as to take my shoes off but I still kept falling, repeatedly; I refused to hold on to anything or anyone.......  that's when I woke up and realized it was just a dream....... It's interesting the lessons we can learn from our dreams.   I was reminded once again th...

Strong Enough

"Look at me Yeeyee.....look!! I'm soooo strong!"   My niece Caitlyn said as she showed off her muscles to me after eating all her asparagus my mom put on her plate.   "Wow Catie...you are strong!!! Good for you for eating all your asparagus! Mama and Daddy will be proud of you!   Caitlyn asks me if she will be just as strong as her daddy.   She hopes to one day; I tell her she needs to eat healthy and eat her meats and veggies (which she does well).   Last weekend she knew I wasn't feeling well, she told me the pot was too heavy for me to put away so she said " no Becky, I will put it away, it's too heavy for you.. you can rest." *Sigh*, if only strength were as easy as eating your veggies and depending on a 4 year old to put away a pot.    But this is not the strength I'm talking about.    I'm talking about the struggles that seems to suffocate me daily.    I'm reminded  by the words of Matthew ...