A JOYFUL NOISE

Almost every time I go to UVA Hospital, no matter what the appointment is for, I come home extremely exhausted. Today was no exception, except my chronic pain hit it's all time high. Since before Christmas, I have been on three antibiotics to try to get rid of whatever my sinuses was holding on to. I've never felt completely better even after each regime of antibiotics. Three weeks ago, I called the UVA ENT clinic and they couldn't get me in until today. *sigh* The chronic pain / nausea along with my more labor intensive breathing due to sinus congestion has made the past 3 months go slow and hard.....but especially the past 3 weeks has been very trying. I've been trying to do everything I can to help me feel more comfortable but getting now where. It's tough. I was half expecting my new Sinus ENT doctor, Dr. Payne, to examine me and say "we can't do anything due to the anatomy of your sinus)." I already knew that was going to co...

What is unconditional love? Unconditional love is a term that means to love someone regardless of their actions or beliefs. All of us try to have unconditional love for those who we care about, whether it is our mate, children, best friend, etc. I always ask myself is my love for my sister, parents, relatives, friends, is truly unconditional. We live in a fallen world, so is there such a person who TRULY has or have shown unconditional love? I thought about this a lot today. Today was hard for me when I found out a sweet young man I know passed away unexpectedly. I think of Ian when I see or hear the term unconditional love....( yes, I reflect on how our Father in Heaven has unconditional love for his children). Ian didn't have a mean bone in his body. When he sees you, you know he will give you a hand to shake or open his arms for a hug. He made friends so easily and loved people so much. He never judged you based on how you look, what yo...

It seems like I start all my blog updates with "sorry I haven't written.....". In fact, there isn't much update going on in my life except the fact that I have not been well since a little after Christmas. I went to AHC urgent care after Christmas because my sinuses were acting up.... 4 wks later I still wasn't feeling well with my sinuses... and still never fully recovered. The last week I went to see my pcp again and I have bronchitis! ugh! So hopefully, this round of antibitics, cough medicine, and Albuterol will knock this virus out. I never used an inhaler before but boy am I ever so grateful for it! My stomach pain continues to give me problems. It's still in the same places; lower right and upper left. As I continue to monitor myself, I'm more and more convinced it doesn't boil down to neuropathic linings in my stomach area. I hurt almost continuously; however, it is aggravated after eating---- and sometimes even after drinki...

I know that traditionally in December, I send out my Christmas card along with a letter about my year and maybe even a photo. This year, I didn't get around to finding the correct card or writing a letter in time before the year ended; so this is why I write this post--- just to let you all know I appreciate your friendship and love once again this past year. I continue to struggle with my physical pain and low energy. I still can't work full time and sometimes even helping my mom around the house takes a toll on me... my pain level increases and sometimes so bad that I have lay down for a good while. You will read about some of my trips I made over the year. It wasn't easy at times with my constant pain, but God gave me strength to enjoy time I was able to spend with friends and family. Throughout the beginning of the year, I continued to go through tests after tests to figure out or rule out things that could be an underlying cause of all this pain. It wasn't ...

Thanksgiving has always been my favorite time of year as well as my favorite holiday. I love fall... the changes of the leaves, the smell of fall air, the change in time, etc. A time to really reflect on the blessings God has bestowed upon me and the blessings yet to come. Yes. Fall. A wonderful holiday. It's no surprise that this year, Thanksgiving, again is my favorite time of year. But tonight. Tonight is Christmas Eve. I seldom ever go out on Christmas Eve by myself, but this year I was blessed to be part of the worship team on Christmas Eve and again tomorrow....Christmas Day. I love the songs of the season. Every year around this time, I do my annual "tradition". I listen to Christmas music on the radio or my iPod/MP3 player as I do chores around the house or do my crocheting, or reading my books. I go into the "back" of my closet and take out my 3 Christmas movies that has a touching story behind it. I watch them. I cry. I hope for a bet...

As most of you all know, I've struggled with health issues all my life. Recently in the past 3-5 years I have had stomach pains that has left me unable to work; I can barely do much of anything without feeling the affects it has on my body. It's been quit depressing. MY GI doctor has done all he could over the past 5 years and with all of the GI tests coming back negative (except for the gastroperesis coming back positive) as well as most of the medications not working, the GI doctor was ats the end of the road. The only thing the GI doctors thought it could be was over active neuro-pathways leading to and into my stomach area They referred me to the pain management clinic at UVA. UVA is really the only hospital I would go to do get anything major done. I've been a patient there for 32 years and will continue to be a patient there. Today I saw my pain management doctor, Dr Johnson. She seems very nice and very willing to help. It was agreed that I was showi...

Lately, I have stewed over the meanings of "trivial" and "normal". Sometimes when people ask me how I'm doing, the matter of fact is that I can't really answer that in fear of not being truthful to myself or others. I can say "I still struggling and still having a rough time", yet the truth is, this illness has been going on for a while. Not just with my recent years of stomach issues, but also with what NF brings with the disease (compromised immune system, trouble with sleep, easy infections, vision instability etc). Then again, I tend to also say I'm doing "ok" because this illness (including my GI issues) is just a part of me that I know I have to endure and it's part of my every day life. People also say to me "I bet you wish your health will return to normal". Honestly, I don't know how to respond. My entire life (yes, since I was born), I've faced doctors, hospitals, etc no less than 10-12...