A JOYFUL NOISE

Rebekah? Yeeeess? Ready? I guess, so! Can my Mom and Dad come too? Sure thing! I’ve walked through those double doors & corridors countless (and I mean countless ) times.   I keep telling myself “It’s going to be okay, God’s got this….God’s got you.”   Yet that doesn’t keep me from my heart racing, fears rising and my wishing I was somewhere else.   The volunteer points me to the bathroom and tells me which room to go to after I use the restroom. Ok, Rebekah, this is your cap, gown, socks….. (in a very cheery voice) Well, you know the drill. I guess.   It looks like you’ve done this many many MANY times! You must be a pro at this. You must be used to this! < USED TO THIS?  Well, honestly, I’m used to the “drill” yes; the other stuff not so much. Never will > The drill of changing into those awfully cold hospital gowns (although I do like those hot air hose that they connect you to keep you warm during prep time); the drill ...

About, three weeks ago, I had a follow-up visit with my pain management doctor, Dr. Davis.  In the beginning of August, I had a procedure done to help alleviate some pain on my lower right quadrant, so it was just a re-check to see how I was doing. I was actually looking forward to this visit because Dr. Davis also knew about my neck injury from the car accident back in February.  He wanted me to wait a few months before doing anything, but my pain was getting worse and worse, so I decided to go ahead and mention it again before the claim for the other guy's insurance try to settle. When I got to the office and try to register, two people were basically on my top of me. One was less than an arm's length beside me and another one was less than a foot behind me.  The person who registered me was "giving out" (confirming) my address/phone number/insurance.  I kept looking at them with a deep glare/stare but they didn't get my "gist"; and I was saying ...

My soul finds rest in God alone, My Rock and my salvation; A fortress strong against my foes, And I will not be shaken. Though lips may bless and hearts may curse, And lies like arrows pierce me, I'll fix my heart on righteousness, I'll look to Him who hears me.  O praise Him, hallelujah, My Delight and my reward; Everlasting, never failing, My Redeemer, my God. ---------------------------------------------------------   This past week proved to be a very hard week for me; and I can honestly tell you that I'm still processing it all. I will probably still process it for a while.  It's been an emotionally and physically tough week and as you all know, both go hand and hand.  Physically, I've been struggling so much. Struggling with the pain, struggling with my cognitive function, and just plain struggling.  I can see you down the hall and have a question in my mind; but as I'm walking towards you I will completely blank out and have no clue why I w...

“I’m ready to sign up to be a crew leader”   “Are you sure you are able to do this?” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Posters were up probably by May. Recruiting started shortly after.   Was it already that time?   I’ve done VBS for quite some time. It was something I loved doing.  Working and helping shepherd kids is something I’ve enjoyed doing and continue to do.  It’s where my heart lies. It’s where I find joy. And for me to double question myself about serving never came about. I knew exactly what my friend’s point was when she asked me if I were really up to the task of being a crew leader or not.  Crew leaders really needed the energy, strength, and endurance throughout the week to help lead and guide the kids.  She knew my physical self hasn’t been all that great lately; and they do need a strong leader.   I knew my physical state hasn’t been all that well.  My chronic pain has been on the flare and other ph...

“God in His Love always wills what is best for us. In His wisdom He always knows what is best, and in His sovereignty. He has the power to bring it about.   God is completely sovereign; God is infinite in Wisdom. God is perfect in Love…….. While it is certainly true that God’s love for us does not protect us from pain and sorrow, it is also true that all occasions of pain and sorrow are under the absolute control of God. If God controls the circumstances of the sparrow, how much more does He control the circumstances that affect us? God does not walk away and leave us the mercy of uncontrolled random or chance events”     --Jerry Bridges, Trusting God Even When Life Hurts One of my favorite devotional books and authors is Jerry Bridges.   His book Trusting God Even When Life Hurts is among one of my favorite out of many of his books. I got this book from a good friend of the family when I graduated from high school; I also was a baby Christian at that tim...

Back on February 25th, my pain management doctor (Dr Davis) approached my lower right side pain a little differently.  He decided to do the usual pain block procedure as he usually does; however, at the same time, he also did an oblation.  This is when he uses heat to basically "burn" that specific nerve.  I have had an oblation done before, but it only lasted a few weeks (I think about 4-6 weeks).  However, the first time my first pain management doctor (Dr. Lee) did the oblation, he went with the traditional method, which means, he did very very low heat and pulsated the nerve.  This means, the heat didn't totally kill the nerve; but sorta of "kept it quiet".  Also when I first had the oblation, Dr Lee didn't use any pain block medication either.   However, this second go around with the oblation along with the pain block preformed by Dr Davis is a bit different.  Dr. Davis went more conventional on the oblation; that is, he went with full ...